30 April and 7 May 2012: Blind


I was blind for so long

I was attacked by a dark force. I take comfort in my contacts with Chreel, Nanthes and my other self.


––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

30 April 

It was nice to talk to my other self the other day. It’s not so that I always need confirmation, but it’s easier for me when I have this contact, I can never see you, but know that you are always both there and here.

How could I have been blind for so very long? I’m thinking like this now and again. Although time does not exist, in this our frequency it does; I cannot deny that this is the case. I surprise myself now and again when I finally figure it out. There did not have to be all that misery all the time if I in some former life understood that.

But now it is as it is. I’m glad it finally succeeded. It is going to get very difficult for everyone, both humans and all living things, but better that than the eradication of everything. It is important to continue my work, there comes a day after today.

I’m happy, spring is coming. I’m going to pick berries and mushrooms this summer. It feels a little special not to have someone to care about. I can pick for my neighbors; that will bring them a little joy.


––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––


7 May

It was a difficult night. I went to sleep as I usually do at midnight. I woke up later and was already up and going. Things were unorganized. I jumped here and there.

It felt as if a dark force was attacking me. I got myself out of it, and later that morning I went through everything I should do. It felt better, I had, though it was hard, done what I should do.

I got a clear vision this morning. It was like a string of beads or drops of water that were moving back and forth gently. It may be that they were planets that were receiving love and blessings. It feels that it was something in that direction. A nice vision, I’m grateful for it.


––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––


Thank you for being here Chreel, I feel your presence all the time. Without you this would not have worked. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it is my consolation that I know that you are in the right place.

I sometimes think back on all we’ve been through together. It cannot be described in words, it is beyond what the words can express. You know I’ve been a little stagnant for some time. So much has happened over the last year, I need a break sometimes. My hip is still not good I don’t know if it will ever be fully restored, I doubt it but I hope for the best.

It is very funny that you call occasionally. I get so excited every time, whether it is one or the other. Yes life goes on as usual as you so well know. I’m waiting to come back to … well, you know so well. I contact my other self now and then. Luckily, he exists.

He helps me, comforts me, and he is who he is. I also feel Nanthes often. It came to us once that we would have a son. We rejected it as something that could not happen. However, we have got our son back, Nanthes, who is now back after two thousand years. He’s back in the illusion, not in the way we once thought, yet again. I will do everything I can so he won’t be disappointed this time, I’ll do anything for that.

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“How could I have been blind for so very long? ”  













“Although time does not exist, in this our frequency it does; I cannot deny that this is the case.”