––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

13 August

I was out in a clearing in the forest and staying in a kind of tent or bivouac. A large faithful dog was with me. It was dawn, I patted and petted the dog that nudged my leg, he was happy that I had woken up.

Even a man who could not be seen was with me. He said something about that it was time to tear down something that was a bit away. Something that was no longer needed.

––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

25 August

In the waking state. I had been in the woods picking berries. My buckets were full, and I went home. I came past a lake on the road and discovered something I had let go of. I got a nice feeling as if something was over or resolved. I am quite sure that it was so. I must ask my other self. He, if anyone knows what it is about.

––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

1 September 

Just before falling asleep this evening a sentence came to me clearly: The eighteenth line in the wallpaper. 

I have thought about these words all day. I understand that it’s important for me to solve this riddle.

––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

17 September

I was on the second floor of a house. A woman was there.

A man came in, a sort of messenger with something the woman signed for. 

I looked out the window; there was heavy traffic on the street. A long truck, a trailer, tried to pass the street. It had dual rear wheels and rear triple boogies. On the platform were lots of smaller machines. There were also hoses for these strange machines. I think the truck got through eventually.

––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

21 September

Today something happened with and for me. I have felt completely homogeneous. It is as if I understood something more, I felt it throughout my body. This has come after I understood the words eighteenth line in the wallpaper.

––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

23 September

My dream this morning: I was standing outside a large house where a doctor had their practice on the second floor.  It was the weekend, this doctor apparently works every day of the week.  A sort of tank stood outside. There was gas in this container. I think I opened the tap and gas poured out of it. 

When I went to turn the tap off, problems arose. I tried several times. Maybe it was several days between visits. I finally managed to stop the flow.

All the while the doctor was working in the building next door.

A difficult dream, I must think about what it can mean. It will probably take time.

––––– ooOO – OOoo –––––

24 September

Jorun: – I am crying out, seeking you and calling on you, my other self.

Amper (always in italics): – Both Chreel and I are here. 

– I thought I felt you wanted to talk to me?

– Yes, Jorun, you feel the slightest thing, It’s correct, we do.

– Is everything as it should be as we said, Chreel and I?

– Yes, everything is so good it can be with you.

– Eighteenth line in the wallpaper. Have I understood this correctly?

– Yes, totally right. You were led astray for awhile, but you usually arrive at the correct interpretation with time.

– Will it be as I thought?

– Yes, exactly as my friend. Jorun, you are being watched by a particular person.

– Female or male?

– Woman.

– She suspects something?

–Yes, she is almost sure.

– Is there a problem with this?

– No, it’s so close now, it will work. 

– May I wonder who it is?

–Both yes and no. She will soon reveal herself to you. There is
nothing negative at all with this.

– I have had several dreams lately, is there something difficult with them? 

– I know it’s hard but you have to solve them. I think you have solved the last one, it seems so.

– Yes, but the second last dream with the doctor and the container outside is difficult.

– You should also solve that one soon.

– I do not understand myself why it should be so. But it is just the way it is?

– Yes, it is. Now Chreel wants to talk to you.

Chreel: – How have you coped with everything for all these years?

– It has not been easy. But who else can say that it’s been easy. What you should know is that without you it would not worked. I think of the time we had together with gratitude. I know you’re in the right place now. We together once said that we hope this is the last time we are born. While I understand that it might be necessary. We’ll see how it goes. Thank you for being here, here in your way. I know you so well.

– Amper, did I get a visit the other day during my rounds?

– Yes, Jorun, you know who it was. You’re a lucky man who gets to experience this. It has never happened to anyone else since the beginning of time.

– The other day, yes, it stayed with me over several days, something came to me, I felt it physically. There is a feeling that cannot be described. I was totally pure and could understand almost everything.

– Jorun, you’ve come as far as it is at all possible as a man. But now it is so that you are two. One of the two, and these two are one. You know that so well. I understand that you felt it.

– Jorun, this was a long conversation. You know who you really are and you do not worry in the slightest. You are who you are. Go in peace, as you say, and as I say, contact me soon again.

Previous Diary Entry  •  Next

“Today something happened with and for me. I have felt completely homogeneous.”  

“I think I opened the tap and gas poured out of it. When I went to turn the tap off, problems arose.”  

“We together once said that we hope this is the last time we are born.”  

“I was totally pure and could understand almost everything.”  

“You’ve come as far as it is at all possible as a man. But now it is so that you are two.”